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Is fidelity necessary in a relationship?

In a couple, solidarity and fidelity are two sides of the same coin. Faithful sexual intercourse is also a ritual that renews the pact of solidarity by making the other unique on a sensory level. If you remove fidelity, what sustains solidarity? Fear? Duty? Social pressure?

On the other hand, the seducer, by obtaining the other's consent (or even just accepting their domination), proves their attractiveness and power, and reassures themselves. Thus, this is an act linked to social ambition. In other words, infidelity is always the product of one partner who fails to master their ego or social ambition, thereby endangering the relationship.

Desire above all

Giving free rein to desire carries serious long-term disadvantages:

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On the one hand, one tends to end up alone. In this sense, placing desire above duty amounts to privileging the short term over the long term.

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On the other hand, it undermines self-esteem. Self-esteem is a very precious asset that is too often neglected, yet it is far more under our control than many other aspects of life, such as social success or finding true love. Let us not forget that we live 24/7 with ourselves and before ourselves. With a degraded self-esteem, one may always deceive oneself or flee into pleasure-seeking, but one will not reach theataraxia.

The New Age vision of sexual freedom

By brandishing slogans such as 'Make love, not war,' the 1968 movement propagated an image of sexuality as nothing more than a pursuit of shared pleasure.
However, at the level of sexual acts, humans partially release their animal instincts. They thus tread a narrow ridge between two abysses: on one side, excessive mental control that blocks access to satisfaction, and on the other, excessive freedom that leads to respecting only one's own desires, disregarding the limits the other sets on one's own desires.

Deepen

Refer to the questions 'Why must one master one's ego?' and 'Why is minimalism desirable?'.

 

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