What is a well-functioning family?

A well-functioning family is a family in which you can be yourself:

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There is a mechanism for rational conflict resolution, based on facts, not dogmas or the social status of the protagonists.

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People are kind to each other.

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The exchanges are of the exchange of experience type.

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We feel supported, because we are aware of the deep difficulties that other members are facing, and vice versa.

All these elements derive very largely from the first.

What is a family that does not work well?

Conversely, here is what characterizes families that do not work:

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Some individuals attack others, either by pathology, or to protect the lie to themselves, or simply to ensure a higher social rank (this is one of the aspects of generalized nepotism) or advantages.

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We hold roles, and we are asked to conform to them.

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There are family myths that we are asked not to question.

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We are alone in the face of our deep difficulties.

Difficulty building a well-functioning family

The great difficulty is generally the lack of fully adult individuals, i.e.:

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Able to look at the facts objectively, without being biased by lying to oneself (because of beliefs).

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Able to oppose other family members, not to improve their personal position, but to ensure the smooth functioning of the group.

Deepen

Consult the question 'What is an adult?'.

 

2022-09-07 11:34:28 Amelie remarks

Le partage et l'ecoute sont pour selon moi deux principes fondamentaux dans le fonctionnement de la famille. Dans une famille, chaque personne a des idees differentes et c'est important de respecter les idees de tous.

2022-09-09 22:32:39 Hubert   

Attention à ne pas confondre les idées et les croyances. Les croyances sont les choses que l'on conserve même quand les faits viennent les remettre en question. Toujours garder à l'esprit que quand il y a des croyances, il y a généralement des victimes quelque part, et que c'est elles qui méritent le plus notre respect.

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